I had an epiphany yesterday.
I was googling, “what’s the purpose of life” because I’m having a bit of an existential crisis.
At the age when many women’s biological clocks are ticking so loudly they can barely hear the man mowing his lawn across the street, I find myself 9.5 weeks pregnant with an unviable pregnancy, waiting for nature to take its course. I’m sharing this with you because I’ve learned that secrets are a burden.
So anyway, it was when I was googling, “what’s the purpose of life” (because an impending miscarriage in your mid late 30s will have you [or maybe just me] seeking answers) when I came across the quote from the Dalai Lama that says, “I believe that the very purpose of life is to be happy.”
What?? The purpose of life is TO BE HAPPY??
Now, this may be something you already know, but to me, it struck me as new information.
How can the purpose of life simply be to be happy? That seems so… simple.
As entrepreneurs, we’re taught that the purpose of life is to be successful. To achieve great things. To build wealth and achievements. To create ideals and better yourself day after day after day. To endlessly strive for more. To be on the cover of Forbes magazine.
Frankly, this is how I’ve been living for the past decade+. I’ve been striving.
I’ll tell you right now that striving does not make me feel happy. It makes me feel lacking. As if whatever I currently have at any given moment isn’t enough. Because I’m constantly striving for something else. Something different. Something more.
How can you feel happy when you’re constantly striving?
Maybe you can feel happy if you’ve determined you’re content where you are and whatever you’re striving for would be a bonus. Maybe then you can be happy and striving at the same time but I wouldn’t know. I’ve had big moments of happiness, of course. But mostly I’ve always been striving.
Entrepreneurial culture can be destructive in this way. When your peers are posting on social media their achievements but not their failures. When happiness seems to only come when attached to achievements.
It can be toxic to always be striving.
I’ve been listening to a podcast on my morning walks the past few days which was recommended to me by a dear friend. The podcast is called, “This Is Love” and it shares stories from regular yet remarkable people. People who are not famous. People who are not entrepreneurs with tales of wealth and achievements. Simply people. People with unique experiences who have left a little mark on their corners of the world and who found happiness in their own ways. It’s really quite inspiring. Much more so than another article about Elon Musk or a book by Simon Sinek.
So my epiphany is that happiness doesn’t have to be so grand. Happiness doesn’t have to be winning a television show or getting a book deal. Happiness doesn’t have to be birthing children or buying a house.
Happiness doesn’t have to be an achievement.
Happiness can be going for a walk and admiring the blue sky and purple flowers dripping from an old tree. Happiness can be watching a duck sleeping standing on one bright orange foot with his neck curled into his wing. Happiness can be a baby goat falling asleep in your arms.
Happiness can be the things around you. Happiness can be the little things. Happiness can be the way life makes you feel.
I’m about to embark on my 2.5 week long trek from Oregon to New York this afternoon. I’m sure there will be many little moments of happiness along the way. And one large moment of strife as nature takes its course. I look forward to absorbing each day as it comes, each adventure for what it is, and each little happiness for what it brings; all while striving for nothing.
Till next time!
Heather
P.S. You’re welcome to follow along on my cross country journey as I post pictures and stories on my Instagram: @RealHeatherSaffer
P.P.S. I might not post anything on Instagram.